哪两位MTV的动画人物认为接吻乐团很酷... These two title MTV cartoon guys thought the band KISS was pretty cool...
应该是瘪四与大头蛋 Who is Beavis and Butt-Head.
-本？-是瘪四与大头蛋 -Ben? -Who are Beavis and Butt-Head.
-正确！-400美元的电视角色 -Yup! - TV character for 400.
我不太擅长与人初次见面 I'm not good at meeting people for the first time.
-嗨 很高兴认识你 我是内森 -很高兴见到你 你好吗 我是科尔 -Hey. Nice to meet you. Nathan. -Pleased to meet you. How are you? Kor.
-门不少啊 -是 - Door city over here. - Yes.
呃 这是基本的吧 就像出入口 在某种意义上 So, this is basically, it's like a portal, I guess, on some levels.
确实 Yeah.
一直有人说我的个性会让人不舒服 I have been told my personality can make people uncomfortable,
所以我必须努力克服它 so I have to work to offset that.
幽默是我常用的本能 但每个笑话都是一场赌博 Humor is my go-to instinct, but every joke is a gamble.
-我要脱鞋吗 还是... -没事这样就可以 - Shoes off or... - Please walk as is.
-好吧 需要脱衣服吗？开个玩笑 - Okay. Shirt off? Or? Just kidding.
-我会穿着衣服 -这里不是... - I'll leave my shirt on. - It's not that...
-这里不是那种地方 -这里不是 我就开个玩笑 - No, it's not that kind of place. - No, it's not, I'm just kidding.
目前为止还不错 而且本该就是这样 So far it was going well, and it had to,
因为我正准备要求这个人把他的人生托付给我 because I was about to ask this man to trust me with his life.
科尔·斯基特是一位来自纽约布鲁克林的50岁老师 Kor Skeet is a 50-year-old teacher from Brooklyn, New York,
他最爱的就是冷知识问答了 and there is nothing he loves more than trivia.
我很擅长电视冷知识问答 -I'm very good at television trivia.
电视名人堂的 Who is the youngest person to ever be inducted
最年轻入选者是谁？ into the Television Hall of Fame?
是位女性 It's a female.
-谁？ -欧普拉·温弗瑞 - Who? - Oprah Winfrey.
几个月前 A few months ago,
科尔回复了我发在克雷格列表的模糊帖文 Kor responded to a vague Craigslist post I put on the internet,
*美国的分类广告网站
分享了一个关于他在12年前向他知识问答小组撒谎的故事 sharing a story about a lie he told his bar trivia team over 12 years ago.
我跟我的朋友说我有一个高级学位 I told my friends that I had an advanced degree,
其实我没有 我经常和他们一起参加知识竞答 and I didn't. I play trivia with them often,
问题在于... and the problem was that I...
我想让他们觉得我实际更聪明 wanted to seem like I was smarter than I was.
我的队友都有高级学位 My teammates all had advanced degrees.
我就跟他们说我有一个硕士学位 I decided to let them think I had a master's degree
在我获得本科学位的时候 when I was just getting my bachelor's.
-你收藏不少啊 -是的 我喜欢藏书 - You've quite a collection. - Yeah, I'm a bibliophile.
《如何整天做爱并让女人达到高潮》 How to Make Love All Night and Drive a Woman Wild?
呃 你知道... Well, you know...
我觉得我们会相处的非常好 I think we're gonna get along pretty well.
-我也不确定 我是说... -是的 - I don't know about that. I... - Yeah.
而现在他就得每天跟他的队友撒谎了 And now it's gotten to the point where he's lying to them every day.
我的一位队友一直给我发招聘信息 I have a friend on the team that keeps sending me,
而那些工作都需要硕士学位 jobs that require a master's degree.
所以现在 这个事又回到我面前了 So now, it's being shoved back in my face again,
而且我已经没有理由了 and I'm running out of excuses.
我理解他的窘境 这个问答小组就是他的全部 I understand his dilemma. This trivia team is his life.
而当你展现真我的时候 人们并不是总喜欢真相 And when you reveal your true self, people don't always like what they see.
但我想告诉他如果你对每种可能性都做好计划 But I wanted to show him that if you plan for every variable,
一个愉快的结果就成为必然了 a happy outcome doesn't have to be left to chance.
字幕翻译：@wushours
我估计你应该看过我的节目了？还是... I assume you've seen some of my previous work? Or...
-我没看过 -好吧 - I'm afraid I haven't. - Okay.
它是... 我做了一个节目叫做《救援高手》 It's... I made a show called Nathan For You.
好 Okay.
你之前不是说你擅长电视节目的冷知识吗？ Didn't you say your trivia specialty is television shows?
是的 但那也是有局限性的 It is, but there's even a limitation on that.
-好吧 -嗯 - Okay. - Yeah.
-我觉得你应该看看 -嗯 我会的 - I mean, you should check it out. - I mean, definitely.
其中很多内容都是和现实中的人打交道的... But a lot of it involved working with real people...
所以我就得全身心的投入在 so I'd have to put myself in all these
这些不确定的环境中 这就让我很擅长 -uncertain environments and I became really good at
预测人们在未来会如何反应 predicting how people would act in a future situation.
-好的 好的 -比如说 - Okay, okay. - For example.
像我们现在正在进行的对话 感觉还不错吧？ Like this conversation's going, pretty well, right?
-是的 我很愿意继续下去 -我是说 你也这么觉得吗？还是说... - Okay, I'd like to continue it. - I mean, do you think so? I don't know.
-是的 我... 到目前还不错 -我是说 我们挺开心的 - Yeah. I'm... So far, so good. - I mean, we've been having fun.
我们分享了一些笑话 I assume we have been sharing some laughs so far.
是的 我希望能继续下去 Yeah. I hope to continue that way.
所以说 这不是个意外 So, that's no accident.
到目前为止发生的所有事 我已经彩排过若干遍了 Everything that's happened so far today, I have rehearsed it dozens of times.
我所说的每一个字 在一个复制你家的屋子里 和一个扮演你的演员 These exact words, in a replica of your home, with an actor playing you.
好的 Okay.
还记不记得几周前 天然气公司过来 Remember a couple of weeks ago, when the gas company came by
因为你们楼里有天然气泄漏 because of a leak in your building?
记得... Yes...
其实 并没有什么泄漏发生 那是我的团队 Well, there wasn't a leak in your building, that was my team.
得检查检查炉子...
当你同意他们进入的时候 When you gave them access,
他们偷偷地制作了你家的电子地图 they secretly made a digital map of your entire home.
我们根据你家的每一处细节建造了一个实体布景 We then recreated every detail of this space
就在几英里外的一处库房 as a physical set in a warehouse a few miles from here.
并且有了你替身的帮助 And with the help of a fake you,
我可以练习这次交流的每一种表现形式 I could practice every single permutation of this interaction
并且有了一个计划 and have a plan for it.
我是说 你觉得我要不要对这些门说点什么？ I mean, do you think I should say something about the doors?
我雇来的演员分析了你上传的视频 The actor I hired analyzed your submission video
来模仿你的说话方式和行为模式 to mimic your speech patterns and psychology.
呃 这是我和...我的父母 我当时... Well, it's me with my... my parents, I was...
我记不清了 我当时可能才10岁？ I can't remember, maybe I was about ten?
《如何整天做爱并让女人达到高潮》 How to Make Love All Night and Drive a Woman Wild?
是的 这是... Yeah, that was a...
我觉得我们会相处的非常好 I feel like we're going to get along pretty well.
我们一遍接一遍的尝试 And we tried over and over.
-嗨 我是内森 -嗨 -Hi. Nathan. -Hey.
-嗨 我是内森 -嗨 你好 -Hi. Nathan. -Hi. Hey, hi.
-嗨 我是内森 -你好 你好 -Hi. Nathan. -Hi. Hi.
门不少啊 Door city over here.
我每次都不断调整 直到达到完美 And I'd adjust each time until I perfected it.
-需要脱鞋吗？ -不用 你穿着就行 没事 - Or shoes off? - No, you can leave them on, it's fine.
好的 需要脱衣服吗？ All right. What about shirt off?
请穿着衣服吧 Leave it on, please.
好的 所以这个可能会逗他开心 Yeah, so that will probably make him laugh.
到目前为止发生的所有事 So everything that's happened so far today,
我已经彩排过若干遍了 I have rehearsed it dozens of times.
这些台词 在一个复制你家的屋子 和一个扮演你的演员 These exact words, in a replica of your home, with an actor playing you.
哇哦！ Wow!
这就是我们能为你对你朋友的谎言能做的事情 This is what we can do for your lie with your friends.
你的知识竞赛 就是说 这就是我所说的可能性 Your trivia, like, this is the potential is what I am saying.
我知道了 就像是一个人 I see. Like a person,
如果我有能力能知道... 如果我知道...其他人 if I had the ability to know... if I knew what... how the other person
其他人会如何反应 或者情况会如何变化 or other people are going to react, or how the situation is going to go...
-你提前就知道了 -是的 - You'll know. - Yeah.
你就完全知道你在每一种情形下该说什么话了 You'll know what exactly to say for every possible way.
那么这将是非常有吸引力的 是的 Then that would be extremely appealing, yes.
但随着我们的对话进行之中 我开始意识到 But as we kept talking, I began to understand
他把这件事拖了这么久的真正原因 the real reason he had been putting this off for so long.
呃 其实一直都挺好的 只是 Well, it's good except for one thing.
我认为我其中一位朋友的反应 Suppose one of my friends might give a reaction
可能会非常 非常的激烈 that's very, very violent on some people,
甚至超过了你可以预测的任何情况 even beyond the several predictions you can make.
你指的激烈到什么程度？ What do you mean by violent?
就像 你知道 喊我的名字 说一些过分的话 Like, you know, call me names and saying things that are so unforgivable
导致我以后再也不能跟他们做朋友了 that I couldn't be their friend after that.
你担心的具体是哪个人？ Who are you worried about specifically?
我还不想说是谁 现在还不行 但是 I'd rather not reveal the name, not at this point, but...
就是在我问答小组里的一个人 it's definitely someone that's on the team.
我发现我现在处在一个尴尬的境地 I found myself in an odd situation.
科尔愿意在照片里指出他的那位朋友 Kor was willing to point out his friend in a photo,
但他不愿意跟我们说任何其他的事 but he wouldn't tell me anything else about her.
她看着挺好的啊 她到底怎么了？ She looks so nice, what is it about her?
她人很好 非常好 只是... She's a nice person, very nice, but...
我该怎么说呢？ How do I put it?
如果她... 取决于她的心情 你不会想和她有太多冲突的 If she... depending on her mood, you don't want to cross her too much.
哦 我的天啊！好吧 Oh, my God! Okay.
这太挫败了 我为今天的彩排 It was frustrating. My rehearsal for today
是想让他能对这件事敞开自我 was designed to get him to open up about this stuff,
但我可能还是没能让他卸下心防 but perhaps I had done something to put him off.
回想起来 我试着开了一个有点不合时宜的玩笑 Thinking back, there was a somewhat off-color joke I tried
在我上完厕所之后 after a trip to the bathroom.
哦 我的天啊 也许我以后应该随身带着皮搋子 Oh, my gosh, I should start traveling with a plunger.
-你觉得好笑吗？还是... -是的 - You think he'd find that funny? Or... - Yeah.
但当我跟真正的科尔讲这个笑话的时候 他完全没笑 But when I did it with the real Kor, it didn't land.
我的天啊 也许我以后应该随身带着皮搋子 Oh my God, I should start traveling with a plunger.
呃 呃 Well, well, well.
我应该备好的
-皮搋子贵吗？-不 不贵 - Are they expensive? - No. No.
是因为这个笑话吗？ -Could that joke have been it?
我本来用这个笑话来自嘲一下 I'd intended the joke to be self-deprecating
我不可预知的排便情况 about my unpredictable bowel movements,
但后来通过反思 but reflecting on it later,
我意识到他可能把这个当成了批评 I realized he could have interpreted it as a criticism
批评他的浴室设备不足 that his bathroom was under-equipped.
不管是什么原因 Whatever the reason,
没有他朋友的其他信息 我没法为科尔组织一场彩排 I couldn't stage a rehearsal for Kor with no details about his friend.
所以 我决定为我们计划一场北部的一日游 So, I planned a day trip for us upstate,
这是充分设计的 好能让他能喜欢上我 that was strategically designed to endear me to him
希望这样 能让他对我敞开心扉 and hopefully, get him to open up.
-你做过这个吗？ -从来没有 - Have you ever been? - Never.
-从来没有？ -从来都没有 - You've never? - Never in my entire life.
所以 你姓斯基特 但你从来没射过飞盘 So, your last name is Skeet and you've never been skeet shooting?
没有 没有 No, no.
我射 Pull.
我没有告诉科尔 I didn't tell Kor,
但我实际上提前在枪里放了空弹 but I had arranged ahead of time to have the guns loaded with blanks,
希望能以此让我们建立起一些联系 in the hopes that it would create a moment of bonding,
因为我们都不擅长这个 because we were both bad at this.
你开枪开早了 老弟 -我开早了 - You fired too early, man. - I fired too early.
哇 我们都不擅长这个 Wow, we are not good at this.
-但体验了新东西还是挺好的 -是的 - But it's nice to have a new experience. - Yeah.
但这只是为主要的事打下基础 But this was just laying the groundwork for the main event.
在温水泳池中相互倾诉个人情况 The mutual disclosure of personal information in a heated pool.
-你之前说你结婚了 -是的 我在婚姻中度过了5年 - You mentioned you were married. - Yes, I was married for five years.
-我结婚了三年 -之前没听你说 - I was married for three years. - Didn't know that.
你觉得难过吗？ Is it sad for you?
我把它当作是我... I consider it one of my...
我人生中最大的失败之一 one of the bigger failures of my life.
-什么之一？ -我人生最大的失败 - One of the what? - Biggest failures of my life.
我本来不想让他打探我的个人生活 I didn't want to go too deep into my private life,
所以我计划了一个老头来干扰我们 so I'd pre-planned for an elderly swimmer to interrupt us,
希望能让科尔觉得 in the hopes that it would convince Kor
我本来想分享更多的 只是此情此景被毁了 I was ready to share more had the moment not been ruined.
我不确定这个展现我脆弱一面的表演能不能使他信服 I wasn't sure if my portrayal of vulnerability was convincing,
但在回家的路上 科尔终于告诉了我他朋友的名字 翠西 but on the ride home, Kor finally told me the name of his trivia friend, Tricia,
她是做什么的？ and what she did for a living.
她是一个自由作家 她有一个博客 She's been mostly a freelance writer and she has a blog,
提供关于省钱和娱乐的信息 gives information about things you could do to save money and have fun.
-博客的名字是什么？ -城市中的廉价小妞 - What's the blog called? - Cheap Chick in the City.
-城市中的廉价小妞？ -城市中的廉价小妞 - Cheap Chick in the City? - Cheap Chick in the City.
-城市中的廉价支票 -城市中的廉价小妞 - Cheap Check in the City. - Cheap Chick in the City.
城市中的廉价小妞似乎是一个实用网站 Cheap Chick in the City seemed to be a bare-bones website
致力于纽约的低成本活动 dedicated to low-cost activities in New York.
我希望这会是一个了解翠西心理的窗口 I was hoping it would be a window into Tricia's psyche,
但看起来这个网站的多数帖子都是在道歉 but it seemed like the majority of posts were just apologies
道歉当天没有更新 for not having anything to post that day.
我理解 有时候你什么都不想说 I understand that. Sometimes you don't want to say anything,
但你想让人知道你还在 but you do want people to know you exist.
不管怎样 我希望这个博客能足够 Regardless, I was hopeful this blog would be enough
能让我们的彩排女演员基于这个博客来表演 for the rehearsal actress we'd hire to base her performance on,
还有科尔的见解 in addition to Kor's insights.
她喜欢一个演员叫文森特... 卡塞... 卡塞瑟 She has an appeal for an actor named Vincent... Karth... Karthreiser.
可不幸的是 这还远远不够 But unfortunately, it wasn't enough.
我觉得如果能知道他们可能的反应的话会很有用 I think it's really useful to get a sense of what their reactions might be,
还有他们可能会说的话 and the kinds of words that they might use.
所以 为了能让她更好的接触到翠西 So, to get her better access,
我决定建立一个我自己的博客叫做节俭男孩 I decided to create a blog of my own called Thrifty Boy,
让翠西有机会能写一篇关于我们的文章 and offered Tricia the opportunity to write an article for us.
幸运的是 她接受了这份工作 And luckily, she took the gig.
她的文章将会为我们的网站采访一位专业的观鸟者 Her article would entail interviewing a professional bird watcher for our site,
因为观鸟不需要花钱 because bird watching is a thrifty thing to do.
但翠西并不知道 But what Tricia didn't know
她实际上是在采访她的替身 is that she'd be interviewing her own doppelgänger,
以此来学习她的一举一动 who would be studying her every move.
-很高兴见到你 -Nice to meet you.
你看起来已经打扮好准备观鸟了
翠西？我女儿也叫翠西 Tricia? That's my daughter's name.
好巧 现在叫翠西或者帕翠西的不多了
所以 你有最喜欢的鸟吗？
我最喜欢蜂鸟 I do love hummingbirds.
乍一看 这个女人似乎一点也不可怕 At first glance, this woman didn't seem frightening at all,
但她的确很爱说话 but she did like to talk.
其实我爸很喜欢鸟 But you know my dad is really into birds.
-哦 真的吗？ -他真的非常喜欢... - Oh, yeah? - He seriously has like--
他住在北卡罗来纳州 所以我估计 He lives in North Carolina, which I guess,
显然 他们那里有一个很大的鸟展 apparently, there's a very big bird show there.
有一本非常好的书叫《女猎手》 我推荐给你 是关于二战的 A really good book called The Huntress, and I do recommend it. It's World War II.
但除此之外 我是说 除了我的室友之外 But otherwise, I mean, aside from my roommates,
我对现在的生活很满意 但我的室友就... I'm pretty happy with the way things are, but my roommate's definitely...
你知道 就像有时候我说 “嘿 我快迟到了” You know, like, "Hey, I'm running late,"
你知道 但也许他找到了一个公用电话 可能吧 但你知道... like, but maybe he found a payphone, maybe, but like...
有一次 飞机开始急速下降 所以在那之后 你知道... One time, like, the plane started plunging, so after that, like...
我现在坐飞机我还有点后怕 而且... I still get kind of nervous when I'm in a plane and...
在30分钟的会面中 Over the course of the 30-minute encounter,
我们的女演员一个字也听不下去了 our actress had trouble getting a single word in,
而且她才是被采访的那一位 even though she was the one being interviewed.
所以 我现在把所有软件都下了 你知道 So, I have all the apps, you know, for the different,
所有的航班 在我的手机里 我想走的时候随时就能走 airlines, on my phone, ready to go, whenever I need to fly.
美国航空 达美航空 Gogo机上娱乐系统 American Airlines, Delta, Gogo inflight entertainment.
但在结束之前 But before it was over,
我想知道翠西会对谎言作何反应 I wanted to get a sense of how Tricia would respond to being lied to.
这样的数据对我们的彩排至关重要 Data that would be crucial for our rehearsal.
其实有一件事我得告诉你 There's actually something I need to come clean about.
好 Okay.
我刚刚说我女儿叫翠西 其实那是骗你的 I said early on that my daughter's name is Tricia but that was actually a lie.
-好吧 -我其实没有女儿 - Okay. - I don't have a daughter.
好 Okay.
我当时就觉得你说你39 I guess I should have guessed when you said you were 39,
我就觉得现在就当妈有一点早了 because it's a little young to have a daughter these days.
没事 挺有意思的 因为你知道 我的意思是 就像我刚才说的 That's okay, that's funny, because I was like, I mean, like I said,
现在叫翠西的不多了 所以我还挺惊讶的 但你知道 you don't meet too many other Tricias, so I was a little surprised, but you know,
你知道... 嗯 挺有趣的 但是我理解 that's... yeah, that's interesting, but I understand.
-不好意思我... -没事没事 不用担心 - I'm sorry that I... - It's fine, don't worry.
你和鸟还有什么其他有意思的事吗？ Do you have any funny moments that you had with a bird?
关于鸟的？ 或者和鸟有关的故事？ With birds? Or any fun stories about birds?
我很惊讶翠西完全没生气 I was surprised by how not mad Tricia was.
科尔是瞎担心吗 Was Kor worried for nothing,
还是因为翠西不好意思跟陌生人生气 or was Tricia just able to bottle up her rage because it was a stranger?
科尔非常确信她会反应过度 Kor was so convinced she would have an extreme reaction
以至于他坚持这个告解只能是一对一的 that he insisted the confession could only go down one-on-one,
在一个公共场所 in a public place.
我觉得 知识问答是唯一一个不会引起怀疑的场合 Trivia would be, I think, the only place that would not arouse suspicion,
因为我们经常就做这个 because that's something we do out of habit already.
我可能会跟她参加一个知识竞答 就我们俩 没别人 I can probably get her in a trivia event, by ourselves, just between she and I.
但当我看到科尔场去的知识竞答酒吧的时候 But when I saw the trivia bar Kor frequents,
我被混乱的环境压得喘不过气来 I was overwhelmed by the chaos of the environment.
这是我从布鲁克林的鳄鱼酒吧拍的录像 This is footage I collected from the Alligator Lounge in Brooklyn,
看起来每一寸空间 and it seemed like any aspect of this space
都可能从根本上改变他的重要时刻的基调 could radically transform the tone of his big moment.
当我遇到科尔时 我就已经亲身体会到这一点 I had learned this firsthand when I met Kor.
我当时觉得我看起来挺牛逼的 I thought I would look cool,
但因为椅子上的一个轻微变动 我坐着就像个傻逼 but due to just a slight difference in chairs, I looked like a fool.
很难说这个地方到底会如何影响科尔的告解 It's hard to say what about this place could affect Kor's confession,
但我的确注意到 这里椅子不少 but I did notice there were a lot of chairs,
而且我不想留下任何未知性 and I didn't want to leave anything to chance.
科尔已经跟翠西发信息说要一起参加知识竞答 Kor had messaged Tricia to play trivia with him
就剩两周了 一切就会在这里发生 in just under two weeks' time. This is where it would happen.
这个他终于能告解自己的地方 The place where he would finally come clean.
所以时间紧迫 So with the clock now ticking,
我邀请科尔来到我的秘密库房来开始他的彩排 I invited Kor into my secret warehouse to begin his rehearsal.
哇 这实在是... 完美的复制品 Wow, this is... the perfect replica.
这一点都没在开玩笑的 这真的... 看起来太... 哇！ That's not even a funhouse version of it. It has... It looks... Wow!
这一次每个细节都被精心复制了 Every detail was meticulously replicated this time.
哦 我的老天！ Oh, my gosh!
这个调料架 全都是他们的调料 大蒜 罗勒 This spice rack, it's the exact spices they have, the garlic, the basil.
这个椅子也完全是... 这些... 这些破皮的地方... This chair is an exact... This... These rips...
是的 那个 就连那个都和那里完全一样 画像有一点歪 Yeah, and that, even that's exactly the way it is. The portrait kind of tilts.
你看到那些气球了没？ 真实的酒吧里也有 You see that balloon there? That's in the real bar.
这就像走进去 在现实中一样 It'll be like walking in, in a normal level,
然后能知道我的方位 and then being able to know my bearings.
当你真到了那晚的时候 一切都会像这里这样 When you show up on the actual night, it'll feel just like this.
-是的 -没有意外 - Yes. - No surprises.
没有 No.
你知道将会发生的每一件事 You know everything that's gonna happen.
进入一个完全一样的空间 There's something strange about entering a space
会有一些奇怪的感觉 that's indistinguishable from another.
你很快就会忘记你身处何处 In moments, you can forget where you are.
对我而言 这就像... 这有时有点超现实 因为... To me, it's like... It's a little surreal at times because...
我的意思是 你知道... 你简直就是... I mean it's like... You're the...
你就是巧克力工厂的威利·旺卡 you're Willy Wonka in the Chocolate Factory
我就是查理·巴克特 试着想要.... and I'm Charlie Bucket, trying to get the...
情节我记不太清了 威利·旺卡是干啥的来？ I don't remember the plot fully, what did Willy Wonka do?
-他是好人吗？ -呃 他建立了... - Was he good? - Well, he created...
-我记得他不是个坏人吗？ -他的确有一些问题 - Wasn't he a bad guy? - He had some questionable things.
他基本上就是这个神秘的糖果工厂的... He was this mysterious... factory full of candy, basically.
但 我是威利... But I'm Willy...
-我是故事里的那个坏人？ -呃 但他能让梦想成真 -I'm the bad guy in the story? -Well, but he's a dream maker.
所以你现在所做的... 就是让我的梦想成真了 And you're doing... you're making some dreams happen for me.
但不是有孩子死在那个工厂了吗 But kids died in the factory.
呃 他们据说是死了 但我也不确定他们是不是真的... Well, they supposedly died, I don't know for sure if they actually...
但他们的确没有一个好结果 But they didn't get some good fate out of it.
我会再看一遍那本书 要确认一下... I'll read the book again just to... to look into it.
嗯 Yeah.
不错啊 It's good.
我们先从最基本的开始 We started with basic blocking,
科尔面临的第一个选择就是他想要坐在哪 and the first choice Kor would have to make is where to sit.
-你的座位在哪？这个吗？ -是的 - What's yours? This one? - Yep. Yes.
-不错 -感觉不错？ - Yeah. - Good?
科尔提出那天晚上 他会提前到达 Kor proposed that on the night, he would arrive early,
用帽子先占好他最喜欢的座位 and secure his favorite table using his hat
然后他就会去拿他们的知识竞答表 while he went to grab their trivia sheet
再到吧台去拿他俩的酒 and drinks for the two of them from the bar.
你好 来点什么？ Hi, can I help you?
我能来杯橘子汁吗 不要果肉 带来一杯玛格丽特 Can I have an orange juice, no pulp, and a margarita, please?
马上就好 Coming right up.
这是玛格丽特吗？这是什么？ Is that a margarita? What is it?
-你刚都放什么了？ -我也不知道... 我只是... - What did you put in it? - I don't know... Just make...
我不知道怎么做玛格丽特 I don't know how to make a margarita.
他觉得一杯玛格丽特 He thought that greeting Tricia with a drink
应该能让翠西有个好心情 would help put her in a good mood,
因为她总是会在知识竞答中抱怨些什么 since she normally shows up at trivia complaining about something.
我室友要把我折磨疯了 My roommates are driving me crazy,
这就像 你知道 有时候你就想 “你没必要变得无礼” and just, it's one of those days where you're like, "You don't need to be rude."
我觉得 就是你知道 说到底我们都是人 I think it's just, like, we're all human beings here.
然后他提议说点笑话让她开心一些 And he suggested trying to joke with her to lighten her spirits.
我估计我可能会说 I would guess I would say...
我可能今晚会给你来点响 I'm going to probably give you a little buzz tonight
因为显然今天有人拨动你的神经了 because I'm sure someone's plucking your nerves today.
好的 这就是笑话吗 还是你就是说说 Okay, is that a joke? Or just a line
-它有两重意思 -好的 - It'll be more of a joke. - Okay.
对翠西可能的每一种反应 我都会记录一个科尔计划好的回应 For every way Tricia could react, I would input a planned response
在这个专业的流程图软件中 from Kor into specialized flowchart software.
-嗨 -嗨 佳肴翠西 - Hey. - Hi, Trish the dish.
最近怎么样？ How you doing?
这将使我们能够为那晚绘制出最佳的流程图 This would allow us to chart the optimal path through the evening.
-你要先聊总统吗？ -不 我会先从双胞胎开始 - Are you starting with presidents? - No, I'm starting with twins.
你先聊双胞胎 然后再聊总统？ You went twins and then go to presidents?
我先从双胞胎开始 然后联系到... I started with twins and I connected to...
-然后再到总统？ -是的 - And then go to the presidents? - Yeah.
一个能引领我们实现最终目标的决策树 A decision tree that would guide us towards key milestones
并帮助我们避免误入歧途 and help us avoid pitfalls.
-嘿 你好 -嗨 佳肴翠西 - Hey. Hi, man. - Hi. Trish the dish.
科尔告诉我 翠西可能会误会他的邀请 Kor had told me there was a chance Tricia could misinterpret his invitation
以为这是一个约会 as a sign of romantic interest.
她还单身 所以我感觉... She's a single person and I guess...
这么多年了 我第一次一个人邀请她 that after all these years, I'm inviting her by myself.
对 Right.
你知道我不常喝酒的 你想让我喝醉吗？ You know I don't drink very much, you trying to get me drunk?
但当我们尝试模拟那种可能性的时候 他给出了一些令人困惑的信号 But when we ran that simulation, he gave confusing signals.
你把你的手搁在这 就这么碰着她的 You're leaving your hand touching hers right there.
呃 但我要是挪开 它就会引来更多猜疑 Well, if I move it then it's going to bring more suspicion to it.
作为一位女性 你有什么感觉？ How as a woman, how would you take that?
如果你刚好碰到一位男性的手 而他就放在那不动了 If you touched a guy's hand and he just left it there.
-她可能会以为你也在跟她调情 -好吧 -She could read that as you flirting back. -Right.
所以 我让科尔练习了一些基本的防御办法 So, I had Kor practice some standard defenses
应对她可能做出的主动行为 to any advance she might make.
真谢谢你为我买酒 I think it's really nice of you to get me a drink.
我觉得真是... 你知道... 真的是... 来到这里挺好... 还可以... I feel like it's... just, yeah, it's nice to go like, come and...
但当然 这些都已经设计好 But, of course, all this was designed
为他的道歉打下完美的基础 to lay the perfect foundation for him to confess his lie.
我跟你说我电脑的事了吗？ Did I tell you what happened with my laptop?
没 还没说 No, no idea.
那天我本来想开电脑 The other day I went to switch it on
但它就是没开 你知道 它当时 你知道就好像... and it just didn't switch on, and like, it was, you know that thing of...
我当时正要写点东西呢 I was in the middle of writing something,
所以我就觉得我可能要失去电脑里的图片了 so I'm thinking I'm going to lose the pictures that are in there--
呃 你谈到失去还挺有意思的 我想要... Well, it's funny that you think about losing, I wanted...
听上去挺严重的 但实际上 没必要担心 因为我... It sounds heavy, but actually, don't worry because I...
情况转变了 This story turned around,
你知道 到最后我电脑里的东西都没丢 like, I didn't actually end up losing the photos and the stuff,
但我还是去把电脑送修了 but I did have to take it to get it fixed.
科尔 我觉得你得主导这场对话 Kor, I think you need to take control of the conversation,
她不会给你开口说话的机会的 she's not going to give you an opening.
如果你就任着她说 那她就会这么一直说 好吗？ If you just let her talk she's just gonna keep talking, right?
我会再试一次的 I'll try just one more time.
看看我是否能找到另一种模式来切入 To see if I can find another pattern into breaking into the conversation.
好吧 试一下吧 Okay. Try it.
就好像 他就是完全不能交流 Like, he just couldn't make any kind of conversation
你知道 他突然就跟我说 关于 你知道 and like, he suddenly said like, something about, like,
菠萝是柑橘家族的一员 就好像... pineapple being a member of the citrus family, and like...
我的学历是个骗局 My educational situation is a fraud.
什么？ What?
但开始他的告解并不是唯一的挑战 But just starting his confession wasn't the only challenge.
科尔担心的事后续的事情 Kor was most worried about the aftermath.
所以 我们的整个方法 So, our entire approach
必须围绕着这个特定的知识竞答之夜的形式来规划 had to be planned around the format of this particular trivia night.
一般每轮有六个问题 大概有四轮 There's usually six questions per round, it's about four rounds.
在第二轮结束后 一般会有一个十到十五分钟的休息时间 After round two, they usually have a ten to 15-minute break.
我们要休息十分钟 我要回去算算分 We're going to take a ten-minute break, and I'm going to add up all your scores.
一般在这段时间 我们就会点一些披萨 And then during that time, sometimes we would order some pizza.
这是两张披萨票 Here are your two tickets for pizza.
理想情况就是道歉大概五分钟 The ideal thing would be to talk about it for five minutes
然后 嗯 就翻篇 and then, yeah, move on.
我不想聊太久 我只是想赶紧说出来 然后就结束了 I don't want to linger, I just want to say it and then pretty much have it dropped.
所以说 你没有硕士学位？ So, you don't have a master's degree?
我没有 我只是不想再让你给我发 No. I just don't want you to send me any more information
任何需要硕士学位的工作信息了 about jobs that have a master's degree...
我真的想知道 到底... 为什么会变成这样？ I really want to understand like, why... how did we end up here?
所以 你只是想赶快结束 So, you just want to shut it down.
我想要赶快结束 所以 我可能会在休息快结束时开始 I want to shut it down. So, at least if I do it toward the end,
这样的好处就是 一旦我觉得“好吧 这太可怕了” 我就能直接走了 then the benefit is I can leave if I think, "Okay, too hairy,"
然后说 “哎呀 我还有预约 不好意思我先走了” and say, "Oops, I have an appointment to go to, sorry, I have to go."
我不欠你什么解释 真的 I don't owe you an explanation for that, I really don't.
我应该向你道歉 让你经历了这些 I owe you an apology for putting you through that,
但我没什么好向你解释的 but I don't feel I owe you an explanation.
好吧 呃 我们能不能 在问答结束之后再讨论这件事 All right, well, can we like, discuss it after the trivia?
我不想再谈论这件事情了 I don't want to discuss it any longer about the situation.
所以 我希望起码在最后一轮结束后 但在分数出来之前 谈论这件事 So, I'd rather say it at least after the last round, but before the scores.
好了 开始整理你们的答案吧 All right, start finishing up your ballots
当你们准备好时就举起答案来计分 好吗？ and bring them up to score when you're ready, all right?
但当我们把开始知识竞答纳入彩排后 But as soon as we started incorporating full rounds of trivia into our rehearsal,
问题出现了 it revealed a problem.
在《速度》中 巴士车顶上的数字是什么？ What is the number on the roof of the bus in Speed?
科尔完全投入比赛了 而当他不知道答案时 Kor became entranced by the game, and when he didn't know an answer,
他就无暇顾及其他事情了 he couldn't focus on anything else.
好吧 看来我要在这个上面丢分了 That's right, I'm gonna lose some points on this one.
我想我应该知道这个的 I thought I would have known,
谁在帕特·萨加克之前主持了《命运轮盘》 who hosted Wheel of Fortune before Pat Sajak.
我现在脑袋里有一万个名字 但我就是想不起来是谁 And I had 10,000 names in my head but I couldn't pinpoint anybody.
当然 好吧 呃 你准备好开始道歉了吗？ Sure. Okay, well, do you want to go into the confession?
还是说你想再试一下还是... Or do you want to try that or...
这样也行... It's the option...
而且他感觉越来越挫败 因为他承认这个谎言的压力 And he grew frustrated that the stress of having to confess this lie
影响了他的知识竞答 was affecting his trivia game.
我要是问题回答不好那这件事就没治了 I'm not gonna take the chance to miss good questions
因为我有这样的压力 because I'm having this burden,
因为我们真的会因为注意力不集中而丢分 because we can actually just lose points because the concentration is off.
你说得对 但谁在乎你比赛的输赢呢？ Right, but who cares if you lose the game?
你就别惦记这个了 这只是某晚酒吧中的知识竞答而已 You got this off your chest, It's just one night of bar trivia.
不 酒吧知识竞答对我们来说就是全部 No. One night of bar trivia is sacrosanct to us.
这是他告诉我 And that's when he told me
如果当晚他在知识竞答中表现不好 that if it wasn't going well on the actual trivia night,
他可能就会放弃这次告解的机会了 he might bail on the confession entirely.
不 我不会... 我肯定不会牺牲我的知识竞答之夜的 No, I would not... I'm not sacrificing trivia night.
-不会为了这件事 绝对不会 -但到这不就是为了娱乐吗？ - Not for that, no. - Isn't it just for fun?
-每个人都喝醉了 不是吗？ -不 - Like everyone's drunk, right? - No.
这样的话 就有两件事都对我不利了 Then, I'm going to have two things against me,
我毁了知识竞答之夜 我还对她撒谎了 I mess up a good trivia night and I lied to her.
所以 于我而言 我起码得做好一个 So, to me, I got to take one of them out of the equation.
好吧 Okay.
我费了牛劲才消除这个夜晚的所有不确定性 I had gone to incredible lengths to eliminate all uncertainty from the night.
但知道当晚真正主持人会问的问题的唯一方法 But the only way to know the actual trivia questions
就要涉及到一点点作弊了 that the real host would be asking would involve some sort of cheating,
那就会有一些不道德 and that would be unethical.
但也许当你本来还有事能做 But maybe it's more unethical to leave things to chance
最终却听从命运安排 可能会更不道德 when there's something you could have done.
所以 作为热门博客节俭男孩的创始人 So, posing as the founder of the popular blog Thrifty Boy,
我以举办节俭男孩知识竞答之夜专题为借口 I arranged an interview with the real trivia host
在真正的知识竞答主持人主持的其他酒吧中 at one of the other bars he hosts at
与他安排了一场会面 under the pretense of doing a Thrifty Boy trivia night feature.
好了 买酒是强制要求吗？ Now, is it mandatory to buy drinks?
因为我们的读者真的不愿意花钱 Because our readers really don't like to spend money.
我们不会强制要求客人购买酒或食物 We have not had a problem with having people forced to buy drinks or food.
还有 酒吧的苏打水是收费吗 还是免费的？ And does the bar charge for seltzer water, or is that free?
这就取决于酒吧了 That's up to each individual establishment.
-而且 我觉得... -太好了 好 - And to-- I think... - Very cool, okay.
我跟他说 我们希望简介中包括一个互动视频部分 I told him we wanted the profile to include an interactive video component
他可以提前把在鳄鱼酒吧里 in which he would read the questions
会问的竞答问题录好 for the Alligator Lounge's upcoming trivia night to camera,
这样我们的读者就能在家免费参加了 so our readers could play along at home for free.
什么冲突起始于1789年 并导致路易十六被斩首？ What conflict began in 1789 and led to the beheading of Louis XVI?
提前知道当晚竞答的问题是一回事 It was one thing to get the trivia questions for the big night,
但让科尔知道答案就是另一个问题了 but making sure Kor knew the answers would be its own challenge.
所以我也不知道为什么阿奇会犹豫不决 So, I don't know why Archie had trouble choosing them
除了性格之外 因为他们长得完全一样 except for the personality cause they look physically the same.
我知道科尔是绝对不会在知识竞答中作弊的 I knew that cheating at trivia was something Kor doesn't tangle with.
-你在知识竞答中作弊过吗？ -从来没有 - Have you ever cheated at trivia? - No.
所以我们开始每天散步 聊一聊家常 So we started going on daily walks just to chat about life,
但我实际上是在利用这些休闲的散步 but I was actually using these casual strolls
在他浑然不知的情况下 to covertly implant every single trivia answer
告诉他知识竞答里每一个问题的答案 into Kor's brain without him knowing.
以防你需要进来 密码是1789 If you ever need to get in, the code is 1789.
好的 Okay.
就像法国大革命开始于1789年 Like the year the French Revolution started in 1789.
我不太喜欢夏天 I'm not a big summer person.
-我还不太... -哦 我操！ - And I'm not a big... - Oh, shit!
-喜欢春天 -全撒在我的DKNY的裤子上了 - ...spring person. - It's all over my DKNY pants.
- Donna Karan New York, DKNY -纽约啊 - Donna Karan New York, DKNY. - Only in New York.
这房子看着挺高啊 Building's looking pretty tall.
确实很高 那也不及世界上最高的建筑高 It is tall but it's not the tallest building in the world.
就是迪拜的哈利法塔 That'll be the Burj Khalifa in Dubai.
-哈利法塔？ -是的 哈利法塔 最高的建筑 - The Burj Khalifa? - Yup. The Burj Khalifa. Tallest building.
这里怎么了？ What's going on here?
发生了劫持 一个男的拿枪劫持了四口人 It's a hostage situation, guy has four people at gunpoint.
进去的时候直接把一个人的脑袋射穿了 Shot someone in the head on his way in.
-哦 我的天啊！这太疯狂了 -哦 天啊 - Oh, my God! That's nuts. - Oh, my gosh.
每到这种时候我就恨中国人发明了火药 It's days like these that I curse the Chinese for inventing gunpowder.
这太疯狂了 我的天啊 That's crazy. Oh, my God.
祝你好运 警官 希望你工作顺利 Good luck to you, sir. Good luck with the whole process.
-哦 我的天啊 -为那个家庭祈祷 - Oh, my God. - Prayers for the family.
还有三天 With just three days to go
科尔就要在真正的鳄鱼酒吧和翠西会面了 until Kor would meet up with Tricia at the real Alligator Lounge,
我找了30名演员在假酒吧里扮演顾客和服务生 I had over 30 actors occupy the space, playing customers, servers.
我们有真正的散装啤酒 甚至还有一套他们披萨炉的模拟系统 We had real beer on tap and even a working simulation of their pizza oven.
我们每彩排一次 Each time we ran through the night,
就会引入新的变量 而科尔就得适应它们 new variables were introduced that he would have to adapt to.
特别关注他坦白的那一刻 With a special focus on the moment when he'd be confessing.
我得告诉你一些事 这件事折磨我很多年了 I got to tell you something, and it's been eating at me for years.
-哦 是吗？ -你们好 吃的还好吗？ - Oh, yeah? - Hey guys, how we doing over here?
-很好 -我很好 谢谢 - Good. - I'm fine, thank you.
两位还需要再来一杯吗？ Can we get you another drink? Can I get you a drink?
我觉得不需要了 I think we're good.
科尔 你不会想在坦白期间有任何干扰的 Kor, you don't want the interruption happening during the confession,
所以也许你到时不要把酒杯留空 so maybe you make sure your drink isn't empty at this point in the night.
-对吧？ 所以也许就嗦两口就得了 -你说得对 - Right? So, maybe tiny sips. - Right.
-你能小口喝吗？ -我知道了 小口地喝 - Can you just take tinier sips? - I got it, take tiny sips.
我们排练了那晚13遍 We ran through the entire night 13 times.
但不像真实世界 But unlike real life,
在这里 你可以随时按下重置按钮然后从头来过 in here, you can always hit the reset button and start over.
这里是世界上你唯一不会失败的地方 It was the one place on earth you couldn't fail.
橙汁 不要果肉 Orange juice, no pulp.
希望你不要介意 我打算跟你说点事 Hope you don't mind? I decided to give you a little buzz.
我打算跟你说点事 I decided to give you a little buzz.
这件事折磨我很久了 It's something that's been eating at me for a long time.
哦 是吗？ Oh, yeah?
这件事一直在折磨我... 我想... It's been eating at me for this... forever, and I want to...
我想告诉你 I just want to tell you.
-不要果肉 -好的 - No pulp. - Okay.
我得跟你说点事 这件事折磨我很久了 I got to tell you something. This has been eating at me for years.
我的学历其实是假的 My whole educational status has been a scam.
可能因为我小时候有类似的问题 我才这样想你们撒谎 Just based after my childhood, I guess there's some issues there.
直到现在我还无法面对的一些不安全感 Some insecurities I haven't been able to face until now.
在我们快结束时 科尔似乎在做一些新尝试 As we neared the end, Kor seemed to be testing new approaches,
但这并不意味着翠西每次能接受这件事 but that didn't mean Tricia always took it well.
我不理解你为什么要对你的学历撒谎 I don't understand why you felt the need to lie about your education.
我是说 这太扯淡了 I mean, it's really messed up.
这么多年 因为你说你有硕士学历 For years, we were trying to help you get a job
我们一直想帮你找一份工作 这么一看都是扯淡 because you said you had a master's degree, and that was all bullshit!
你就是这样看待我们的友谊吗？ Is this what you think a friendship is?
你完全不尊重我 浪费我的时间 Like, you have no respect for me, no respect for my time.
我才不在乎你的学历 I don't give a crap about your education.
但... 12年的谎言 整整12年！ But... but 12 years of deception, that's... 12 years!
我没办法原谅你 以后别再联系了 It's unforgivable. I don't want to talk to you again.
拜托你不要走 Please don't go.
这个男的在他学历撒谎了 我刚才都听到了 He lied about having a master's degree. I just heard their conversation.
-连硕士都没有？ -这男的真是个骗子 - No master's degree? - This guy is such a fraud.
-在座谁没有个硕士学位啊？ -今晚知识竞答的失败者是... - Who doesn't have a master's degree? - And the loser of tonight's trivia is...
科尔·斯基特 Kor Skeet.
你确定你想要这么做吗？你确定？ Are you sure you want to do this? For sure?
怎么说呢 能坦白这件事还是挺好的 Well, it still felt good that I got it off my chest,
哪怕这意味着在这个过程中会失去友谊 even if it means I might lose a friendship in the process.
而且 我不觉得事情会变得那么糟糕 Like... I don't think it'll go that bad.
但是... But...
我真的是要进入未知领域 进入鳄鱼的巢穴 I'm literally going into the unknown, the pit of the alligator, and...
他到底会把我生吃了还是会放我走 he's going to swallow me up or let me go free.
我们之前计划让科尔早点到 能提前占好他选择的位置 We had planned for Kor to get there early to secure his chosen table.
但当他到达时 问题来了 桌子已经被占了 But when he arrived, there was a problem. The table was taken.
幸运的是 我们对于这种情况早就已经排练好了 Fortunately, we had rehearsed for this exact scenario.
打扰你们一下 我的奶奶最近 得脑癌去世了 Sorry to bother you, my grandmother died of like, brain cancer recently...
...这个 太糟糕了 ...and this, terrible thing.
这张桌子能让我想起她 This table here is like a sentimental thing.
我知道你们都已经坐在这了 但能不能请你们换一个地方 I know you're all settled here but would you consider to moving to another area?
-我知道这听起来有点过分 -我们可以坐哪里 - I know it sounds outrageous. - We can go one table over.
-好 如果你想的话 -你们太好了 - Yeah, if you want. - That'd be nice of you.
-太谢谢你们了 -不用担心 - Thank you so much. - No worries.
我奶奶最近也得了类似的病去世了 My grandmother very recently died of something very similar...
我感到很遗憾 I'm so sorry about that.
-你们有橙汁吗？ -有 - Do you have any orange juice? - Yes.
-可以不加果肉吗？谢谢你 Do you have it with no pulp? Thank you so much.
你可以去那里去披萨票
谢谢 Thank you so much.
你好啊！ Hello!
-嗨！ -佳肴翠西 - Hey! - Trish the dish.
-我的天啊！-最近怎么样？ - Gosh! - Now what?
我决定给你来杯朗姆可乐 来点刺激的 I decided to get you a rum and coke, a little buzz.
因为肯定有人惹你生气了 Because I'm sure everyone's been plucking on your nerves,
还是 你知道... or someone you know...
哦 我的天啊！真的
今天过得真是太差了
今天我本来有个急活想干
但我没做 因为我觉得认为我赶不在六点前完成
但显然我还是有时间干完
所以我没赚到外快 而且
我还把时间都浪费在我室友身上了
我讨厌这样
还有一个特别烦人的 嗯...
美食车停在我的公寓外面
一直噪声不断
我投诉他们了 但是过了好久
我打上车的时候 他们才终于走了
我现在心情真的是不太好
我不知道你还有没有心情听 但是真的...
今天过得真是太差了
对了 而且...
果不其然 翠西的心情并不是很好 As expected, Tricia showed up not in the best of spirits,
但科尔清楚的知道应该说什么来让她开心 but Kor knew exactly what to talk about to cheer her up.
布什家的双胞胎 珍娜和劳拉 The Bush twins. Yeah, Jenna and Laura.
他们是总统的孩子中唯一一对双胞胎 They're the only two children of a president, that are twins.
所有总统 有的甚至有八九个孩子 With all the presidents, sometimes having eight or nine kids.
而他们都没有双胞胎 And none of them had twins within that range.
连夭折的双胞胎都没有 连这种情况都没有 Not even stillborn twins, not even like in that situation.
-所以他是唯一有双胞胎的 -这实在是... 太有意思了 - So he's the only one. - That's very... that is very interesting.
-科尔正在按剧本走 而且的确如预期一样 Kor was sticking to the script, and it was working.
他是孙代还活着的总统里 He's the earliest president we have
最早的总统 that had like... has grandchildren still living from that generation.
这太疯狂了 That is so crazy.
没过多久 就到了知识竞答的时间了 And before long, it was time for trivia.
女士们先生们 老弟老妹们 Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
终于到了万众期待的一刻 我们要开始知识竞答了 the moment you all have been waiting for, we're going to start playing trivia.
什么交通方式使骑手处于悠闲的躺卧状态 What mode of transportation places the rider in a laid-back, reclining position,
让骑手的重量舒适地均匀分布 distributing the rider's weight comfortably over a large area?
现在到处都是这种卧式自行车 These freaking recumbent bikes are everywhere.
什么交通方式 What mode of transportation
使骑手处于悠闲的躺卧状态 places the rider in a laid-back reclining position,
让骑手的重量舒适地均匀分布 distributing the rider's weight comfortably over a large area?
是不是火车啊 美国铁路可能有那种东西 我也不确定 Probably a train. I think Amtrak did that but I'm not sure.
但也许是一种自行车 就是那种 后倾的那种自行车 Or it could be a bike, or something like that, one of those reclining bikes?
但你也不会把自行车的座子往后倾啊 But you don't really, recline the seat of a bike.
嗯 Yeah.
科尔在第一个问题上稍有失误 Kor was slightly off on the first question,
让我有点担心答案会不会没有被他完全记住 and I was worried these answers weren't fully absorbed into his brain.
正确答案是 我是自行车 The correct answer to that is a recumbent bike.
-这实在是 -是的 我就知道是一种自行车 - This is like, really - Yeah, I knew it was a bike.
但是我... 我就感觉... 我以前看见过 但我就是想不起来叫啥 But I... I know... I've seen it, but I couldn't imagine the name.
-我之前听过 -我不记得名字了 - I've heard the name. - I wouldn't know the name.
但后来 情况转变了 But then, things started to turn around.
正确答案是 法国大革命 The correct answer is the French Revolution.
瞧瞧你！ Look at you!
正确答案是 火药 The correct answer, gunpowder.
正确答案是 哈利法塔 And the correct answer to that is called Burj Khalifa.
太好了！ Good!
就这样一直连胜到了第四轮 It was an amazing streak that continued until the end of round four,
他现在似乎充满了自信 and he seemed to be brimming with confidence
在他交上积分表的之时 by the time he got up to hand in his score sheet,
就意味着要开始他坦白的时候了 marking the start of his window to come clean.
谢谢你 我一会就回 Thank you. I'll be right back.
在我们的假酒吧 我们曾排练过 In our fake bar, we had practiced an option
他会在第四轮结束后马上去买披萨 where he would get pizza for both of them right after the fourth round,
这样 在翠西忙着吃的时候 他就能更容易的开始道歉了 so it would be easier for him to initiate the confession while her mouth was full,
而既然她有聊天的心情 科尔似乎决定开始了 and since she was in a chatty mood, it seemed like he had decided to go for it.
-两份芝士披萨 -两份芝士的？好的 请稍等十分钟 - Two cheese pizzas, please. - Two cheese? Okay, ten minutes.
-好的 -然而 有事发生了 - Okay. - But then, something happened.
当他回到桌子等披萨以后 翠西没说话 When he returned to the table to wait for his pizzas, Tricia wasn't talking.
这正是他开始告解的好时机 但不知何故 It was the perfect opportunity to begin his confession, but for some reason,
他并没有这么做 he wasn't doing it.
那些是...
酒水的优惠券吗？
-是的 是的 -好的 - Yeah. Yeah. - Okay.
一段时间后 披萨会更好吃 The pizza tastes better after a certain period of time,
披萨一开始也不错 但在几轮之后 它就真的... the pizza's good but then, after a couple of rounds, it really hits it in...
到了最好吃的时候了 尤其是再来点朗姆可乐 Hits it to the last spot. Especially after a couple rums and cokes.
时间一分一秒的过去 他就是无动于衷 And as the clock kept ticking, he just sat there.
比如 你问问刚端着披萨的那位女士 披萨来的越快 In this case, ask over the lady who'd take the pizza, the faster it comes.
哦 我的老天 Oh, my gosh.
我心里有件事我一直放不下 所以... There's been, something on my mind I've had to deal with and...
你知道 可能 披萨好了吗？ you know, maybe it's there?
好了吗？ Is it this one?
稍等一下 Hang on a second.
好吧 好吧 Okay. Okay.
应该快了 Almost around the corner.
怎么了？ What's up?
他们按铃了 披萨应该是快好了 They ring the bell, they're getting closer to making the pizza.
嗯 应该是 你刚才想说什么？ Well, I guess so. Now what were you saying before?
这件事一直让我很困扰 我得告诉你 I feel bad that... this has been bothering me a long time to tell you this.
到底怎么了？ What's that?
我的学历可以说 算是个骗局 My whole educational life has been, kind of a fraud.
-真的吗？ -嗯 - Really? - Yeah.
记得我几年前给你看的我的毕业照片吗？ Remember when I was showing pictures of my graduation a couple years ago?
在大家面前 之前给你们看过的？ In front of the gang and everything like that?
记得 Yeah.
你们当时问 说我得到了硕士学位 And then you asked at the time, said that I got a master's degree.
-我当时也就没说别的 -真的吗？ - And I kind of went along with it. - Really?
是的 Yeah.
我感觉很糟糕 因为当时没能跟你们说实话 I felt kind of bad because I didn't want to level with you about that.
好的 嗯... Okay. Well...
我当时其实是拿的本科学位 I was only going for my bachelor's degree at the time.
那也很厉害呀 It's still pretty impressive.
我打的意思是 你知道 很多人都没有硕士学位 I mean, you know, lots of people don't have master's degrees.
没事 没什么 因为我以为你有硕士学位但是... It's cool, I'm not surprised, because I thought you had a master's but...
稍等一下 稍等 Hang on a second, one second.
好的 谢谢你 Yeah, thank you.
-两份芝士的？ -是的 谢谢你 - Two cheese? - Yes. Thank you.
我不知道你没有硕士学位 我还以为你有的 I didn't realize you didn't have your master's degree, cause I thought you did.
你之前是这么说的 That's what you said before.
是的 是的 我觉得... 这当时这么说是因为 Yeah, yeah, I've... see the thing is that, what made it worse was
我刚加入小组时候 知识问答小组的 I came into the group, the trivia group,
我当时是 你知道 最晚获得大学学位的人 I was, like, the last person that even had a college degree.
这让我有点自卑 And I kind of felt like inferior about that.
这太傻了 你没必要为那种事情难过 That's so silly, don't you feel upset about that.
很多人高中都没上完 Lots of people barely even finish high school.
我妹妹两年才才拿到她的普教证书 你知道吗？ My sister only got her GED like two years ago. You know?
我就是 你知道 这么久以来一直没说穿这个谎 Well, I just, you know, and I kept that lie going on all that time.
这一直折磨着我 然后后来 你帮我 你知道 申请工作 And it kind of ate at me and then, you helped me, you know, apply for jobs,
所以我甚至发了我的简历 就是想安慰你 so it actually went that far to even send my résumé just to appease you.
我很感动 我之前都不知道 I appreciate that so much, I had no idea.
我就感觉 你知道吗？ 我只是... And I feel you know? I just...
我很珍惜咱俩的友谊 My friendship with you means a great deal.
我也是 Me too.
我不想让你觉得我还会继续撒谎了 And I don't want you to think that I would even continue lying to you.
而我一直以来的这个谎让我感觉非常不好 But I've been living this lie all this time and I kind of felt bad about that.
嗯 你能告诉我这些真是太贴心了 我之前完全都不知道 Well, it's so sweet to finally tell me about it. I had no idea.
你能告诉我这些真的很勇敢 我完全都不知道 It's very brave of you to tell me this, and I really had no clue.
没有转移话题 Instead of trying to move on to another topic,
科尔在接下来的一个半小时都与她坐在一起 Kor sat with her for the next hour-and-a-half
开始分享他在他们友谊的20年间 and began sharing things that he had never told Tricia
从没告诉翠西的事 in their nearly 20 years of friendship.
我爸的情况是 用他寄来的儿童抚养费 And my father used the situation where he sent the child support,
本来是留给我和我上大学的 我和我妹妹 which could be for my college education, for me and my sister.
但当我们该上大学的时候 他不愿意为我们交学费 And by the time we came of age, he doesn't want to pay for it.
这太艰难了 我感觉到很遗憾 真的 That's rough. I'm sorry to hear that. I really am.
更糟糕的是 当我要毕业的时候 And what made it worse was when I was graduating...
我们排练的时候 While we were practicing,
我还让科尔排练了他道歉的后果 在实际的夜晚之后 I also had Kor rehearse the aftermath of his confession beyond the actual night.
无论是失去友谊的煎熬... Whether it be the torment of a friendship lost...
还是友谊加深的欢乐 or the joy of a friendship strengthened.
他的告解打开了一扇 Where his confession opens the floodgates
第一次真正对话的门 to actually talking for the first time.
这真是太棒了 这就像 感觉与平时有很大的不同 This is so nice, it's like, like such a difference from just normally
我们去酒吧玩 本来只有知识竞答 然后... when we're hanging out in the city in a bar, just playing trivia and...
也许当你能提前活在未来 做出选择才是最容易的 Maybe it's easiest to choose a path when you can live the future first.
释放自己的疑虑和遗憾 To free yourself from doubt and regret,
永远知道结果如何 to always know the answers.
一个支持艾滋病患者和HIV携带者的标志 As a symbol of support for those living with AIDS and HIV.
所以 应该是丝带 So, what is a ribbon?
-哦 是的 -红丝带 - Oh, yeah. - Red ribbons.
我可能会因为没说颜色而丢分 I would have lost a point on the color.
-所以 你感觉怎么样？ -太棒了 - So, how are you feeling? - Fantastic.
我们比我们想象中做的还好 当我们赢得比赛的时候 We actually did better than expected, when we actually won.
嗯 恭喜你 Well, congrats.
是的 有些问题都在我的知识范围内 Yeah. There were questions that were in my wheelhouse.
在我知识范围内的问题 The questions that were in my wheelhouse,
那些问题 我就都把他们答对了 I was able to answer those particular questions correctly.
你现在解脱了 感觉肯定很好吧 You got everything off your chest, and it must feel good.
我解脱了 我还在那晚赢得了比赛 I got it off my chest, and I still won that night.
-知识竞答... -是一个附加的... - Trivia... - Which is an ex...
我还赢了知识竞答 我感觉这就像是圣代上的点缀的樱桃一样 I won a trivia night, and that's the extra cherry on the sundae, I guess.
有一件事我必须得... There's something I need to...
向你坦白 come clean about.
实际上 我早就知道那晚知识竞答的题目了 So, I knew what the trivia answers were going to be tonight
我就在你不知不觉中提前告诉了你答案 and I taught you them in advance without you knowing,
我知道你反对作弊 and I know you're against cheating
但这实际上不是作弊 因为你并不知道你在做什么 and this isn't cheating because you actually didn't know I was doing it,
因为我只是... 想让你专注于你的告解 but I was just... wanted you to focus on the confession,
我只是想让你有自信 但我感觉很不好 我只是... and I wanted your confidence to be up, but I feel terrible about it, and I just..
对不起 我感到很抱歉 I'm sorry. I want to say I'm sorry.
好 Yeah.
好的 我理解你说的 而且... Okay, I understand what you're saying and...
你的动机是好的 只是... I appreciate your motivation, but...
你把我玷污了 你毁了我一生中最重要的事 you've tainted, you've ruined the whole thing for me,
因为我知道了答案 我知道了答案 我现在还上电视了 because I knew the answers, I knew the answers and I'm on TV now,
现在大家都觉得我其实不知道答案 and everybody now is going to think that I didn't know them,
都觉得我是个伪君子 而你... that I'm a fake and you...
你知道这对我来说有多重要吗？ You know how important this was for me?
这是个错误 这是个巨大的错误 你他妈的把这些全毁了 This is a mistake. It was a huge mistake, and you fucked this all up.
你是一个很坏... You're an awful...
很坏的人 awful person.
我觉得你是一个... 很好的人 I think you're... a great guy.
你真的很好 Like you're a great person.
-嗯 谢谢你这么说 -是的 只是... - Well, thank you for the compliment. - Yeah, just...
我平时不怎么夸人的 I don't give compliments a lot,
所以我想坦白 就说一些赞美的话 so I wanted to come clean about just kind of saying the compliment.
我对人们的肯定不够 是的 所以... I don't affirm people enough. Yeah, so...
-就像是... 嗯 -你能这么说真好 - It's just kind of like... Yeah. - That's nice of you to say.
-谢谢你 -你是个好人 你是 - Thank you, - You are, you are.
-这很让人感动 -当然 - That's very touching. - Of course.
字幕翻译：@wushours